Post by tennessee on Jul 22, 2008 17:29:46 GMT -5
As promised, now that the pay-per-view is done, I'm going to start on my sizable list of shows to review.
I plan on doing this mostly in chronological order as shows were posted...
But I'm making an exception with the first show--my good buddy Den's latest installment of Raw.
Alrighty...
We begin our down and dirty review of Afterlife's league leader in the use of Exclamation Points!!!! I kid because I care.
I usually do my reviews stream of consciousness style and will continue same format. Cuz I can.
OPENING INTERVIEW
-No one in this hobby captures The Rock promos better than Den. This is not open for debate. The Clinton reference and Foley's State of the Union remark made me think how cool it would have been for Rock to come out with a podium and some bastardized WWE version of the Presidential Seal. Not that the interaction wasn't fabulous in its own right.
-I love the idea of someone being "smugly puzzled". I'll try to convey that emotion if I ever become an actor. I'm sure I'd win lots of awards if I could pull that off.
-Den also has captured the spirit of the late 90s/early 00s Y2J to perfection. Take notes, kids: this is the kind of stuff that makes a series.
-I absolutely ADORED the cheap heat/pop by Y2J on Vancouver.
-Ditto for the Rock's lullaby.
-Tremendous brawl. If WWE wants to present its current Raw as being an out of control den of chaos, they should do something like this instead of weak stuff like Kane whomping on cameramen.
VINCE BACKSTAGE
-Only the Den could approximate a time line on his shows. The only time line I've got is "long", "longer" and "too long." But enough about my sex life. BADUMCHING!
-Ah, the old father and son rivalry/dissension storyline. It's just like Shakespeare... but with a flabby gay former Intercontinental Champion playing the part of Rosencrantz.
EDGE V. ALBERT
-At long last, a match!
-Given the way Den's style comes to fruition, it sort of makes sense--buuuut, describing a guy's wrestling outfit as he makes the way to the ring can make for quite the stumblebum of a sentence from time to time.
-Is Taker TRULY gone forever? I say, surely not!
-Good big man/little man match. Edge isn't exactly tiny either, which allows him to get in some power moves and vary up the content of the contest. Edge gets the win, as expected, but Albert looks surprisingly tough in defeat. Nice effort.
KURT ANGLE SEG
-Olympicontinental. Outstanding. Is that new or have I just missed it before? Perhaps I blocked it out upon reading the Pants-Shittingly Good 2 out of 3 betwixt Angle and Eddie last week.
DX
-Why does the notion of Chyna encouraging DX with a fist pump create a mental picture of Pat Summitt?
-OK, cheap heat from Jericho? Awesome. Cheap heat from DX? Substantially less awesome.
-Nitpick I: The mixed live reactions don't jive with the pretty universal boos as DX gets out the limo in the prior seg.
-I foresee new tag champs tonight, and a defense against Kane and Benoit in the future.
BACKSTAGE SHENANIGANS
-Benoit just arriving? Pfft. Slacker. That would get him major heat with WWE for not being there since sun-up. At least he's following Johnny Ace's yet-to-be-enforced-cause-the-series-is-set-before-it dress code.
ACOLYTES ARRIVE
-Anthony is the most inspired character in the Den series. If I ever do a cross-promotional deal with Den, I'm stumping for an Anthony & Flip tag team.
EUROPEAN TITLE MATCH
-There's something to be said about how Den keeps his matches simple. That's not a bad thing, mind you. But he doesn't load up with head drops and crazy high flying shenanigans. His matches, by and large, have a good, basic psychology grounded in solid fundamental pro wrestling. Kudos.
-The spinning DDT counter out of the armbar = awesomeness.
-OK, the Jarrett run-in on its own? Fine. What I had the problem with was the Eddie splash from the top rope to the floor. If that's one of your biggest enemies? Fine. If you're a Jeff Hardy/Mark Briscoe type with no regard for your personal safety? Jump away. It just seemed like a really big risk and out of character for Eddie.
ANGLE VS CHRISTIAN
-Triple demerits for the champ entering first. Always drives me nuts.
-Best match of the night, to this point. Was so good it seemed way too short, which is a compliment as I see it.
JEFF & D'LO
-These two deserve their own sitcom together. Perhaps some cross-branding with MyNetwork. I can only imagine the simmering "will they or won't they" sexual tension storyline.
DUDLEYVILLE MATCH
-Cool idea. Could've benefited a bit from maybe a week of hype, but it fits the "anything goes" style unpredictability of Raw.
-Short brawl, but the sheer brutality of it made this the right way to go. Nasty final move by Saturn. I say throw em all in an every man for himself match for the Hardcore strap at KOTR.
Our JVC Kaboom Slam should be renamed the JVC Gratuitous High Spot of the Week. For this week only, mind you!
SHANE VS STOOGES
-If Patterson doesn't DERP, we riot!
-I'll be honest I skimmed this one. By the way it's "Brisco" not Briscoe. The Briscoes are everyone's favoritest non-selling yet awesome ROH tag team.
-Wouldn't it have made more sense for Shane to put Vince in the handicap match against the Stooges if Shane BEAT the Stooges?
-Stephanie out, and she's summoning Vickie Guerrero!
IVORY
-She always had quite the MILF quality. Am I wrong?
-I wonder. Since all the McMahons have matchmaking ability couldn't they just void any match they dislike made by one of the others?
-Ya know, 20 Canadian dollars is actually worth MORE than 20 American now? Thanks for nuthin, Dubya!
JEFF VS D'LO
-One of my favorite Pet Midcarders in action!
-Jesus, Jeff is taking a beating. I consider this creative karma for his horrendous new theme music on current WWE TV.
-Ouch. Senton onto the raised knees.
-Jeff with the victory roll win. I foresee a Cinderalla-type run for Jeff during the coming tournament.
TAG TITLE MATCH
-Mostly sizzle in first hour, but some solid content here with four matches essentially back to back.
-Cool visual with Kane pulling Chyna "to hell." But, unless you wanted to make a REALLY bad sex tape, why would you want Chyna in the first place?
-Meh... you lost me a bit with the "covered in soot" and wall of fire. Using the whole "magical" stuff with the Brothers of Destruction is a mighty slippery slope in my opinion. While the wall of fire certainly is a cool visual, it just...
how can I put this?
It stretches the limits of believability in a medium that already requires suspension of disbelief even for the most routine match or segment.
BENOIT VS GUNN
-DAMN. Very effective. Benoit ain't playin around, that's for sure!
ROCK AND MANKIND BACKSTAGE
-As much as you nail the characterizations of Rock, Austin and Jericho, sometimes the Mankind... I don't know, it just feels a little flat? Like the words coming out of his mouth just seem a bit generic, rather than with Rock or Y2J where I can actually picture the Real McCoy himself cutting the promo.
MAIN EVENT
-Mankind charges the ring to fight Austin and Jericho by himself! Dumbass.
-I have nothing negative to say about this one. Just a great, vintage Raw main event right here with four of the best from the Attitude days.
FINAL THOUGHTS
-All in all another fine effort from the Den-man! No real weak spots, aside from a few gaps in logic in my opinion. Definitely my interest is piquing for KOTR!
I plan on doing this mostly in chronological order as shows were posted...
But I'm making an exception with the first show--my good buddy Den's latest installment of Raw.
Alrighty...
We begin our down and dirty review of Afterlife's league leader in the use of Exclamation Points!!!! I kid because I care.
I usually do my reviews stream of consciousness style and will continue same format. Cuz I can.
OPENING INTERVIEW
-No one in this hobby captures The Rock promos better than Den. This is not open for debate. The Clinton reference and Foley's State of the Union remark made me think how cool it would have been for Rock to come out with a podium and some bastardized WWE version of the Presidential Seal. Not that the interaction wasn't fabulous in its own right.
-I love the idea of someone being "smugly puzzled". I'll try to convey that emotion if I ever become an actor. I'm sure I'd win lots of awards if I could pull that off.
-Den also has captured the spirit of the late 90s/early 00s Y2J to perfection. Take notes, kids: this is the kind of stuff that makes a series.
-I absolutely ADORED the cheap heat/pop by Y2J on Vancouver.
-Ditto for the Rock's lullaby.
-Tremendous brawl. If WWE wants to present its current Raw as being an out of control den of chaos, they should do something like this instead of weak stuff like Kane whomping on cameramen.
VINCE BACKSTAGE
-Only the Den could approximate a time line on his shows. The only time line I've got is "long", "longer" and "too long." But enough about my sex life. BADUMCHING!
-Ah, the old father and son rivalry/dissension storyline. It's just like Shakespeare... but with a flabby gay former Intercontinental Champion playing the part of Rosencrantz.
EDGE V. ALBERT
-At long last, a match!
-Given the way Den's style comes to fruition, it sort of makes sense--buuuut, describing a guy's wrestling outfit as he makes the way to the ring can make for quite the stumblebum of a sentence from time to time.
-Is Taker TRULY gone forever? I say, surely not!
-Good big man/little man match. Edge isn't exactly tiny either, which allows him to get in some power moves and vary up the content of the contest. Edge gets the win, as expected, but Albert looks surprisingly tough in defeat. Nice effort.
KURT ANGLE SEG
-Olympicontinental. Outstanding. Is that new or have I just missed it before? Perhaps I blocked it out upon reading the Pants-Shittingly Good 2 out of 3 betwixt Angle and Eddie last week.
DX
-Why does the notion of Chyna encouraging DX with a fist pump create a mental picture of Pat Summitt?
-OK, cheap heat from Jericho? Awesome. Cheap heat from DX? Substantially less awesome.
-Nitpick I: The mixed live reactions don't jive with the pretty universal boos as DX gets out the limo in the prior seg.
-I foresee new tag champs tonight, and a defense against Kane and Benoit in the future.
BACKSTAGE SHENANIGANS
-Benoit just arriving? Pfft. Slacker. That would get him major heat with WWE for not being there since sun-up. At least he's following Johnny Ace's yet-to-be-enforced-cause-the-series-is-set-before-it dress code.
ACOLYTES ARRIVE
-Anthony is the most inspired character in the Den series. If I ever do a cross-promotional deal with Den, I'm stumping for an Anthony & Flip tag team.
EUROPEAN TITLE MATCH
-There's something to be said about how Den keeps his matches simple. That's not a bad thing, mind you. But he doesn't load up with head drops and crazy high flying shenanigans. His matches, by and large, have a good, basic psychology grounded in solid fundamental pro wrestling. Kudos.
-The spinning DDT counter out of the armbar = awesomeness.
-OK, the Jarrett run-in on its own? Fine. What I had the problem with was the Eddie splash from the top rope to the floor. If that's one of your biggest enemies? Fine. If you're a Jeff Hardy/Mark Briscoe type with no regard for your personal safety? Jump away. It just seemed like a really big risk and out of character for Eddie.
ANGLE VS CHRISTIAN
-Triple demerits for the champ entering first. Always drives me nuts.
-Best match of the night, to this point. Was so good it seemed way too short, which is a compliment as I see it.
JEFF & D'LO
-These two deserve their own sitcom together. Perhaps some cross-branding with MyNetwork. I can only imagine the simmering "will they or won't they" sexual tension storyline.
DUDLEYVILLE MATCH
-Cool idea. Could've benefited a bit from maybe a week of hype, but it fits the "anything goes" style unpredictability of Raw.
-Short brawl, but the sheer brutality of it made this the right way to go. Nasty final move by Saturn. I say throw em all in an every man for himself match for the Hardcore strap at KOTR.
Our JVC Kaboom Slam should be renamed the JVC Gratuitous High Spot of the Week. For this week only, mind you!
SHANE VS STOOGES
-If Patterson doesn't DERP, we riot!
-I'll be honest I skimmed this one. By the way it's "Brisco" not Briscoe. The Briscoes are everyone's favoritest non-selling yet awesome ROH tag team.
-Wouldn't it have made more sense for Shane to put Vince in the handicap match against the Stooges if Shane BEAT the Stooges?
-Stephanie out, and she's summoning Vickie Guerrero!
IVORY
-She always had quite the MILF quality. Am I wrong?
-I wonder. Since all the McMahons have matchmaking ability couldn't they just void any match they dislike made by one of the others?
-Ya know, 20 Canadian dollars is actually worth MORE than 20 American now? Thanks for nuthin, Dubya!
JEFF VS D'LO
-One of my favorite Pet Midcarders in action!
-Jesus, Jeff is taking a beating. I consider this creative karma for his horrendous new theme music on current WWE TV.
-Ouch. Senton onto the raised knees.
-Jeff with the victory roll win. I foresee a Cinderalla-type run for Jeff during the coming tournament.
TAG TITLE MATCH
-Mostly sizzle in first hour, but some solid content here with four matches essentially back to back.
-Cool visual with Kane pulling Chyna "to hell." But, unless you wanted to make a REALLY bad sex tape, why would you want Chyna in the first place?
-Meh... you lost me a bit with the "covered in soot" and wall of fire. Using the whole "magical" stuff with the Brothers of Destruction is a mighty slippery slope in my opinion. While the wall of fire certainly is a cool visual, it just...
how can I put this?
It stretches the limits of believability in a medium that already requires suspension of disbelief even for the most routine match or segment.
BENOIT VS GUNN
-DAMN. Very effective. Benoit ain't playin around, that's for sure!
ROCK AND MANKIND BACKSTAGE
-As much as you nail the characterizations of Rock, Austin and Jericho, sometimes the Mankind... I don't know, it just feels a little flat? Like the words coming out of his mouth just seem a bit generic, rather than with Rock or Y2J where I can actually picture the Real McCoy himself cutting the promo.
MAIN EVENT
-Mankind charges the ring to fight Austin and Jericho by himself! Dumbass.
-I have nothing negative to say about this one. Just a great, vintage Raw main event right here with four of the best from the Attitude days.
FINAL THOUGHTS
-All in all another fine effort from the Den-man! No real weak spots, aside from a few gaps in logic in my opinion. Definitely my interest is piquing for KOTR!